If one of your humans is engaged in some close activity and the other is idle, stay with the busy one.
This is called "helping", otherwise known as "hampering." Following are the rules for "hampering":

a. When supervising cooking, sit just behind the left heel of the cook. You cannot be seen and thereby stand a better chance of being stepped on and then picked up and comforted. It's even funnier when they try to avoid
stepping on you and fall into a counter or table.

b. For book readers, get in close under the chin, between eyes and book, unless you can lie across the book itself.

c. For paperwork, lie on the work in the most appropriate manner so as to obscure as much of the work or at least the most important part. Pretend to doze, but every so often reach out and slap
the pencil or pen. The worker may try to distract you; ignore it. Remember, the aim is to hamper work.

d. When a human is holding the newspaper in front of him/her, be sure to jump on the back of the paper.

Things you can learn from your cat

Make the world your playground.

Whenever you miss the sandbox, cover it up. Dragging a sock over it helps.

If you can't get your way, lay across the keyboard till you do.

When you are hungry, meow loudly so they feed you just to shut you up.

Always find a good patch of sun to nap in.

Nap often.

When in trouble, just purr and look cute.

Life is hard, and then you nap.

Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few hours.

Variety is the spice of life. One day, ignore people; the next day, annoy them.

Climb your way to the top, that's why the curtains are there.

Make your mark in the world, or at least spray in each corner.
Always give generously; a bird or rodent left on the bed tells them, "I care".

HOW TO CLEAN A CAT: (from the Dog's perspective)

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water.

3. Obtain the cat and carry him to the bathroom.

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape).

CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for anything he can find.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power wash and rinse" which I have found to be quite effective.

6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.

Sincerely,
The DOG